Sunday, October 23, 2011

Being Single

When I just started my PhD, I think it makes sense why I’m still single. Last time, I think marriage is something beautiful and wonderful. Yea, have a life partner, can go anywhere together, sharing everything and having babies and so on. Now I am realizing when a woman getting married, most of the burden is on hers. During a pregnancy, I observe a lot of symptoms happened.

i) Morning sickness
ii) Nausea and even vomiting
iii) Fatigue
iv) Frequent urination
v) Repulsion of certain foods and smells.
vi) Incredible appetite
vii) Dizziness and feeling faint
viii) Mood swings

Then, during trimester pregnancy these will happen

i) Backaches and hip pain
ii) Leg cramps
iii) Shortness of breath
iv) Varicose veins, hemorrhoids and spider veins
v) Swelling of the feet and ankles

What happen if I have to go through all these hard moments alone while a husband is not around? Who cares? At the same time I have to finish my study, rushing with assignments, presentations, collecting data for research and sometimes doing part time jobs. Then, I have to walk around the campus because the campus is not car-user- friendly. It is hard to get parking and limited to the students. Unless, I declare myself as an OKU. Studying and working while pregnant are not going to be easy because I need to take EXTRA good care of myself. If stress it can lead to high blood pressure, eclampsia, anemia, fluctuating blood sugar levels and bla.. bla….. of course stress when a husband is not around, busy with his business, work commitment and so on..

After pregnancy, during confinement may be better. I can take leave and it can be good IF at that time I already collect data for literature review or already collect data (survey @ questionnaires). So, it is a time for me to do the analysis.

After that, who want to take care of my baby? Send to my mom? How about breast-feeding?
See, a lot of question marks there.. and I don’t want to describe more…

Okay, some may say, for what you are studying up to PhD level? As a woman, why don’t you just marry and stay at home doing chores, prepare meals, washing clothes, take care of the house and children while the husband going out for working? Easy job right? But it is not easy actually, unless I’m married to a rich guy who can support me financially and mentally. Is the money very important to me? Not at all, but the most important is………….





..my contribution the society, nation and my religion.


Oh, I am not a superwoman.

Thursday, September 29, 2011

Registration

Bismillahirrahmanirrahim..

Now, I'm a university's student again. Actually, I'm carrying this status since I was in 19. After completing my 1st degree in 2005, I started to work with consultant QS firm and then register as part time student for doing MSc. by research. It was not going easy carrying two status. Alhamdulillah, I managed to finished my master degree but it took more than 5 years to graduate. Along the way, there were a lot of hardships. All the praises to Allah for giving me the strength to come accross the ordeal. After 6 years working experience as a QS and lecturer, I decided to resign and focus to my study. Even I have resigned from my current job and don't have a security in term of monetary, I believe, there is a good fortune for me.


I was registed on 5th of September 2011. After paying the study fees and mahallah fees, officially I'm became a student. Woow, such a great feeling. On the next day, I sit for English Placement Test conducted by CELPAD, alhamdulillah I was exampted and could register to the respective Kulliyyah I was offered.




The processes as a student will have not finished until death